Goodbye India!

It's been a week now I've been back in the USA. I can't believe how fast time has gone by. Just reflecting on everything that has happened, who I am now, and how differently I perceive the world. For the sake of my own sanity I'd like to finish the story of my trip, and this will be my last blog from the eyes of India... 

I was glad to be back in the mountains, and again felt refreshed and ready to learn about the culture. After being gone so long, being sick for so long, and taking night buses over and over, I was ready to just rest, and relax. 

After having a good nights rest, I woke up in my soft bed to a fly buzzing around my head, did some sun salutations, and took a shower. I went down to order breakfast and explained my plans to head to Chamba- a little town 2 hours away, for an international festival. The hotel manager explained that he was going with his family in half an hour, and I was more than welcome to ride with them. After gulping down some chai, half an hour later, I found myself in a Jeep with 7 children, and 4 adult couples driving with huge smiles on their faces for some family fun. I was so grateful for them giving me a lift, and it was really fun to be in the car with such a big family. It didn't take long to get to the town, and I talked with one of the fathers who had fun practicing his English. :)

As we drove into the city, mobs and mobs of people crowded the streets, that there wasn't even enough room for the cows to walk through. I felt like I was in a marathon line up, and we got out- me with my backpack, and the mothers with their children hugging close to their legs. I thanked them, and explained that tonight I wanted to go to Amritzar by bus, so I said goodbye and walked to the bus station. I mingled my way through the crowd, and walked into the busy station to get a ticket for 11:50pm to Amritzsar. I then went to a fancy hotel and asked to leave my bag behind the counter until my bus left at night. The guy at the reception was so nice and let me keep my bag there, so I just had my little purse, passport close, and some rupies.  

Let's hit the party! I walked out of the hotel, and walked inside this fenced in block of tents, roller-coasters, ferriswheels, a stage, and millions and millions of people. I walked over to a circle of people who were all standing on their tiptoes to see some action in the center of a rink. I walked up and laughed to myself realizing I was taller than all the other Indians and could see perfectly fine. There were two huge Indian sumo wrestlers in the middle of this sand pit, pinning each other to the ground, face in one hand, and butt cheek in the other. Both were all sweaty and dripping with sweat in the grueling heat. The crowd leaned in closer, and I became aware that a huge line of Indian guys had formed behind where I was standing, and began a line up to touch me. I flipped around, eyes dripping with distain at the short, black mustached loafer behind me- "you sick man.... move," I said with my gaze, and the crowd parted to let me by. 

 I spent the next 3 hours walking through tents, chewing on dried fruit, looking at the new plans for the city, and buying gifts. I got some lunch inside this tent, with 5 guys pouring sweat, slapping flour and dough from hand to hand, rolling naan, and pinning in the the side of the tandoor. They looked like they were so hot, and like they were having fun, and I decided to have lunch there. All the people were clapping, and laughing, so happy to see a white forign girl eating at their little tent. They kept bringing me bowls of different curries, rice, and breads to try, but could only eat a little! I was getting full. All that for 40 rupies, less than one dollar! Delicious! 

My heart felt warmed by everyone's kindness, yet it was so hot and I was tired from being in the loud crowd. I made my way down through the quiet town which reminded me a little of the streets of Venice. Quiet rock streets, little blue shutter rooms with flowers, and surprises around the corner. A man saw me and invited me into his Chai shop- I had to try his tea- according to him. :) I sat at a table and he carefully brought me a glass of tea, and I drank it feeling very happy and thankful. He kept bringing me little indian sweets, but I couldn't eat but one because I was so full. 

I thanked him, paid, and continued walking down from the town into the valley to the edge of the mountain cliff. This part of town was very laid back and quiet. Little chickens were pecking at the dirt between the stone street, and a little bell was ringing as the reincarnation gompa was spinning in the wind. A guy on motorbike sped by, "there's nothing down there, turn back!" 

Yet I thought to myself- I enjoy watching people harvest their grain, cook in their kitchens, children whistling from the window, and cows walking down the street. This is the culture and can I love and enjoy the simple things one calls nothing is my everything.  I continued walking, meditated in the sun on this large rock, and when I opened my eyes, a whole family of girls was watching me and giggling with shining eyes. One of the girls knew 5 or 6 words in English, and asked, "You, home?" "USA," I said with a big smile. We started talking, asking the names of all the girls, and they wanted me to come into their house. After I was introduced to their old mother, who had 7 daughters, 5 granddaughters, and 4 grandsons, her daughters around my age asked if I like to dance. Before I knew what was happening, we were dancing in a room with a large stereo to the best Punjabi music I had ever heard. The older grannies, and aunties loved watching all of the young people dance, and I was having so much fun! They were laughing, as I was laughing- I felt so free. 

It was getting dark and I declared I must go back closer to town because I was going to Amritzsar tonight. This girl Samba who was 15 walked out with me and wanted to talk more, so we walked over to a stone step in the middle of this courtyard and took a seat. She asked if I had a boyfriend, then started telling me about her Punjabi lover. "Amberto is my sex," she said laughing, eyes all dreamy and sweet. We both laughed together, and hugged goodbye. I was all sweaty and said goodbye. 

I went back to the hotel, put my purchases in my backpack, met this Indian guy who was extremely attractive, went walking together- but was immediately turned off whenever he through his plastic juice bottle on the ground, not even bothering to look for a dustbin. I declared that he was not worth my time, and went off to get a seat next to this really nice girl and her mom watching the Punjabi star. It was dark now, and there were 3 time more people at the fair to see this famous Bollywood singer. I got up to get some dinner, and only walked a couple feet when this guy grabbed my butt. I turn around to see him walk in front of me, and I whip my hand and smack him in the face. "Fuck you, mother ....# !"  I said really loud, enough to hurt his ego just incase my slap wasn't hard enough. This woman came up to me and asked me what happened. I told her that he touched me, and she asked me if I slapped him. I told her I had, and she looked me in the eye and said, "you did the right thing, these men are good for nothing." Then she turned around walked over to where the guy was walking, and smacked him again. I liked that lady. 

After a couple men touched me again, boobs, butt, hair, back, I was ready to leave, and go to the bus. It was getting late and I had 15 minutes to spare. I walked to the hotel, grabbed my backpack and got on the craziest bus ride of my life! There is no way I would have gotten a seat, but when I walked up to the bus I was so thankful I had bought my ticket ahead of time. For the next 10hours I was elbow jabbing, and slapping men, and at one point told all the men around me to go fuck themselves, if they were even going to think about touching me. The bus was so crammed that I had human body part in every crevice of my body. This guy's arm was sticking over my head and his hands kept dangling between my eyes. I laid my head back, and tried to get some sleep, but it was impossible. There was no comfortable position, and there were suitcases and luggage covering my feet, so I couldn't move at all. After a sleepless, bumpy, exhausting ride, we arrived in Amritzar at 5am in the morning. 

As everyone was piling out of the bus, this guy comes up and touches me on the boob from behind. I was so pissed I turn around and smack him on the back. I couldn't get out of my seat yet and that's all I could do- as I yelled, "fuck you shrimp!"  out the window, then realized what I said later. 

I slowly got off the bus, legs asleep from being crammed next to so many people, and feeling sick. This grey bearded moses came up to me asking if I wanted a rickshaw. I ignored him until I climbed the latter to the bus, half asleep, unstrapped my backpack, and climbed back down. I went for a wee, splashed some water on my face, and was ready to move it. I had wanted to see the golden temple for a really long time, and today was the day. 

Moses biked me to the entrance to this white temple complex where I left my shoes, and quickly found a dorm room for forigners to sleep. I dropped my bag, and curled up in a ball on this musty mat next to a red bearded man, and went to sleep. I didn't wake up until 2pm, went to the bathroom, ate some dahl, and walked down the marble floor to see my first sight of the golden temple. 

I was in awe, and immediatly felt like I was dreaming. It was so majestic, peaceful, quiet, and really hot! Hundreds of Sikks were bathing in the water, walking around the moat, or waiting in line to go to the temple. I popped into this building with a huge golden casket and just meditate for awhile how blessed I was to be there. I went back to my room, then went to sleep for 3 more hours. 

I woke up feeling very sick, and had a really bad cough. This nice kid who I had spoken to earlier came up to see if I was doing okay. I asked him if he knew where the train station was, and he offered to take me. He was so nice! Louis from France- and man did he like to talk! I was feeling incapible of doing the smallest task and oh so sick at the time, yet he was very patient, and kind and waited with me half an hour in line while I arranged a ticket to Delhi the next day. We ended up walking together around the complex, talking (minus the couple hundred people asking our names and nationalities), and just enjoying poking fun at each other with a good dose of sarcasm. It's amazing how well we connected. He reminded me of my little brother. 

After dinner, we started walking and made a couple Indian friends who encouraged us to serve and help clean the temple. It was already 2am, but suddenly after talking with Louis, I wasn't tired anymore. There were women and men taking stainless steel buckets full of water from a huge pool to this important building, and washing the white marble. I was in charge of transporting the water to and from the building, and went twice as fast as the plump old ladies singing their Sikk hymns. It felt good to walk on the warm marble with cold water swashing under my feet. Louis and I slashed some water on each other, until I accidentally soaked our Indian friend in his only night clothes. Oops haha. After ridding a couple of my stalkers by Louis telling them we were engaged, I played a prank on one of the girls in our dorm room, and then went to bed knowing I had to get up in two hours. I set my alarm for 4am and two hours later....

I got up and fumbled out the door to walk towards the entrance of the golden temple. All that time yesterday, and I never got to go inside, but I was going to today. There were people chanting, and occasionally everyone would stop walking and chat together. I stood in line for the temple, and finally walked inside at a perfect timing to watch a musical band surrounding a wise guru preach this message and read their special book which is kept inside the temple. It was 5am in the morning, yet so many people were up, had showered, and their turbans wrapped to perfection. The dedication to get up every morning and do the same ritual. Wow. The inside of the temple was unreal. I felt like I was in a magical box made of gold. Everyone at one point bowed down with their face towards their guru images, yet I was the only one standing. In a way it was kind of ironic watching all of them bow down. I felt like I was getting stared at a lot for not bowing like the rest of them. 

I went out to the deck of the golden temple. The sun was just piercing the sky with a crimson pink color through the darkness, and the cool night air was mystically blowing softly. Incredible. I stood there for awhile soaking it all in. When I walked back to the entrance to the temple, Louis was standing there. We had planned to meet at 5:15am, but I was a little late. We went to breakfast and had chai with biscuits- eating with the rest of the people on long mats in a huge dining hall. I didn't want to talk- but just soak it all in. 

We had the same train to Delhi, and decided to walk to the train station to save money on a rickshaw. Long story short, we ended up running, and taking a rickshaw- to run on the train as it was pulling away. My ticket was in my hand the whole time we were running, and when I handed it to the ticket master, it was shredded in pieces- he looked at me laughing with his eyes as I pasted it back together with my spit. 

A 20 year old kid sat next to me, and started talking to Louis and I. It wasn't long before he started rubbing my thigh- and I asked him to stop touching me. Louis pointed out he had six fingers. I looked down to see that sure enough- the boy had 2 thumbs! 

The train ride took 7 hours. Louis and I talked the whole time, in between talking with other people, a man showing us his six toed foot, and getting veg pakota for lunch with bannana's. We got off at New Delhi Railway Station, took the metro into the city to get a few things, and made a friend with this really nice man who helped me find what I was looking for, and the same with Louis. He bought us iced coffees, and we had tea at this really nice cafe. He explained he was a fashion designer, and we enjoyed listening to his stories. Once he knew my nationality he had a lot to tell me about Americans and Obama, and I just listened politely not wanting to get carried away in political debates. 

It was time for me to go, and Louis had to go to the airport to go back to China to study. He was so nice and walked down to the metro with me. We said goodbye, and I took the metro to Greater Noida, to pack up my stuff, and head back to Delhi the next day after having dinner with Ajay my friend. We had a lovely dinner, with mango lassies, and naan with palak panner! Yum! I enjoyed hearing about how his family grew up, and his dreams of opening up a coffee shop of his own one day. 

I took the metro to the airport metro, made a friend on the way, and got to the airport at 9pm. I was ready to go to bed, and went to the visitor lounge to find a place to sleep. I met the sweetest French teacher traveling together who had just gotten back from Nepal. They invited me to share a corner on the floor next to them, and I willfully accepted. I was tired and excited at the same time. I kept singing- I'm going back to America, and shivering in the corner. The airport was so cold it was ridiculous! At 4am I could pretend to sleep anymore- and it was time that I could check into my flight. I changed from my fleece, hat, and gloves, to some traveling clothes, checked into my flight and after sleeping an hour, boarded my flight to London. 

London, Chicago, then OKC, and meeting a Jesuit priest, missionary family, and watching Kung Fu Panda 2 on the way. I had a lovely time on the flight, and was loving all the selections for music, and movies. The luxury, the cleanliness, the fact that I was going to be hugging my mom for the first time in 10 months, in 2 hours. The flight from Chicago to OKC was the shortest of all the flights, yet the longest. After flying over Pakistan, France, and Greenland, seeing all the natural beauties of 5,000m peaks peering above the cloud line, nothing compares to the beauty of seeing your very own mother, father, brother and sister waiting for you with arms wide open welcoming you home. 

Nothing ever felt so good to finally be in the arms of my mom, and to have a family bear hug once again.

It's been a week since I've been back, and I feel absolutely thankful and blessed to be here 100%. The things that used to bother me about American are but a blur compared to the absolute freedom I have as an American. Yes adjusting has been difficult and I await more of the journey to figure out where my place is now as I fulfill my calling. All the praise and glory be to God forever. He is always with me, and no matter where I am free-falling, his deepest love for me will never change.